Of all the things that were in short supply when most people began to shelter in place, the lack of one important commodity seemed to strike a chord.
What To Do If You Run Out Of TP
You searched on Amazon
And everywhere else
You even braved the store
Searched every shelf
But the brand-new gold
Is all sold out
Each square you use
Brings rolls of doubt
You’ve got maybe a week
And that’s counting the tissues
Now is NOT the time
For stomach issues
After that you’ll switch
To Brawny Super-Tough
And wish they didn’t make
Paper towels so rough
But even those will seem dreamy
As you move to just paper
That printer tray holds
A ream of rear-scraper
If you get the Sunday Times
Sing a joyful song:
And put that politician’s face
Right where it belongs
And then, perhaps
That old shirt, forgotten
Thanks for the memories, dear pal
And for being made of cotton
So take stock NOW
Before the shortage begins –
What could you use in a pinch
In
The end?
Produced by Laura Rice
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